Once in a while
I take a break from everybody's expectations
'He withdrew into the cave, about a stone's throw beyond them, and knelt down and prayed. "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me. Yet not my will but yours be done." (Luke 22: 41-42)
News of the baby has started to spread around the parish and the playground, and so far everyone has been amazing. Genuinely happy for us, despite a few raised eyebrows! Not surprising of course.
So flattering that we have been chosen for this again - His trust in us has brought us to tears of humility, confusion, and delight over the past days.
As vicar says, we can draw strength from this positive reaction and build on that to face the family.
I worry a lot about this. I worry that I haven't declared my faith publicly enough to use it in this way to justify what we have 'done'.
What have we done
Are we 'absolved of negligence' after the operation last April?
I worry physically for Trx, and the long hot summer holidays that she was looking forward to.
I worry A LOT about telling my parents.
I feel I should not 'fear the evil day' and I am praying all the time now for guidance and strength. We would not be in this situation if we could not overcome the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.
And yet I am genuinely happy, excited and feel very arrogant and proud.
Is that so bad?
Hmmmm....
New song sent through from Athol today entitled "Spiral". Each one gets better than the one before - she has a future ahead of her. Wsihing that we could meet again, and that I had gone with my gut reaction and asked her to Goldfrapp instead of Kink. Ridiculous of course, so the idea didn't last above a few seconds. Crazy tho that it must have been nearly 3 years now??
Sat through 2 hours of a crap seminar on PAYE Online Filing this afternoon.
Stan is on a go-slow and driving us mad.
Trx is out this evening for her first taste of Alpha.
Revd Randall always says that God has a sense of humour.
It is so perfectly timed, and I have prayed for this moment too for a long time.
Moving on together will enhance everything for both of us.